As if it weren't enough to be steering their kids into a jazillion after-school activities...
It seems people are no longer satisfied with simply pushing their children too far -- now, they're doing it to their pets. No longer is chewing on a bone, licking oneself, or pushing one's eggs across an arctic ice sheet enough. No siree. These days, pet owners expect more from their animals, in the form of a dizzying slate of extracurricular activities which include, but are not limited to, surfing, scuba diving, and open water swimming.
Why these cats, dogs, penguins, and other species seem to be pursuing so many water sports is unclear, but one thing is for certain: Animals are under way too much pressure these days, and it's adversely affecting everything else they do, from digging, to shedding, to playing with balls of string.
There was a time when domesticated animals had very little to worry about but mere survival. But now, with the advent of kitty salons, dog bakeries, and the gradual takeover of Hollywood by a small group of stealthy penguins, life has become way more complicated, and pets find themselves having to worry about their coiffure, their weight, and now, sadly, their athletic performance. So the next time you see a horse or an iguana playing raquetball or waterskiing, don't just laugh and take pictures. Have some pity on the poor creature and offer him or her a cold brewski and your copy of the latest John Grisham for Pete's sake... Or for Snowball's.
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