ALBINO RATFISH!

Ever hear of a ratfish? Betcha haven't. Ever hear of an albino ratfish? Bet everything I own you haven't--okay, that's not much, but still, I do enjoy having a couch, and I'm not inclined to relinquish it casually.

Anyhoo, this ratfish was found off the coast of Washington State's Whidbey Island, and, in being albino, is apparently a real rarity among sealife. Check out the full story here. "I've seen tens of thousands, if not hundreds of thousands, of ratfish in my career, and have not seen a completely albino one before," said Wayne Palsson, a Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife biologist who studies groundfish populations in Puget Sound. Palsson's comment made me realize that ratfish are to marine biology what agents are to Hollywood. Except, I still haven't come across an albino agent in my so-called "career." My first thought was that if I do come across one, I will definitely be eager to do business with him (or her,) because maybe he'd be more human than other agents. But then, I thought better of it: Albinos get bullied a lot, so an albino agent would most certainly have an even bigger ax to grind than your normal, garden variety, Napoleon complex-having agent.

I would like to be albino for a day. I think it'd be kinda neat. For a day. As I said. Longer than that might be kinda tough. Especially if I resided near the equator. You could go broke trying to pay for all that sunscreen...

Check out some nineteenth century albinism in full effect:


Neat, huh?

WILDFIRES!

We were camping in the Santa Ynez Valley Saturday night. Winds gusted at about 40 miles per hour the entire night. In the morning, everything seemed calm and copasetic. Until: We smelled and saw a small cloud of smoke billowing nearby. Was some jerk ignoring the "no campfire" restriction? Well, you could say that: Moments later, a fire marshal--the battalion chief no less--cruised by in his fire vehicle, and asked us "how long we were planning on staying." we said, "oh, do we need to leave now?" He said, (in a tone generally reserved for sharing recipes,) "well, you don't have to, if you're prepared to leave all your stuff behind. There's a four-hundred acre fire burning below you. Surprised they haven't evacuated you by now." I've never seen five tents come down so fast. On the way out of the valley, we could see planes flying around, spraying the fire. And then of course, our way home was fraught with smoke, ash, a deeply darkened sky, and a bright red moon, as we drove through the towns adjacent to several other fires, most notably, the Canyon fire in Malibu. Here's a map which marks the more than fifteen fires that were burning yesterday in Southern Cali.

So, does all this mean the end is near? I think so. But until then, I'm going to buy stock in water.

HALLOWEENIVERSARY!

Yo Readers,
We celebrated our two year wedding anniversary this weekend in La Jolla. It was really great. But there was one obstacle to perfection--how were we supposed to go jewelry shopping with THIS guy in our way? I mean, not even diamonds are worth an encounter with a ghoul. Or a goblin, or a zombie... I hate to sound racist, but they all look alike to me!

I guess I should get used to sharing my birthday and my anniversary with Halloween, my most dreaded of holidays. Yes, I hate it. Dressing up = total waste of time. Scary costumes and horror films = scary and horrifying. Candy = bad for you. What's to love? But you know what's kinda romantic? My husband and I both share a strong dislike of that aforementioned extravaganza of candy corns and plastic vampire teeth and cobwebs. So I guess you could say, without Halloween to bring us together, there might not be any anniversary at all. Yeah, you could say it, but you'd be way off. But... you could say it. Go ahead.


Say it! Or I will send a goblin to haunt you and your entire family. Hoohoohhaaaaaahhaaa!

Let it Ride: The Craig Kelly Story

Just saw the snowboarding documentary "Let it Ride" last night, about legendary snowboarder Craig Kelly. It was a really inspiring movie. One of those things that makes you wonder what the hell you're doing with your own life. Or, at least, it made ME wonder that. Not only is the snowboarding footage (mostly shot by pro documentary-maker Jacques Russo) incredible, but the message about trying to live life for the moment, instead of wondering what's around every next corner, comes through loud and clear.

The film also explores the history of snowboarding, the rivarly between Burton and Sims, and gives a nod to snowboarding's precursor, kids' toy "The Snurfer."

But even if you're not interested in anything deeper than some sick carves on stomach-turning, totally exposed faces, you'll probably still love this movie.

FROM SUPERMARKET TO PSYCHOLOGY...

Does anyone remember the Alpha Beta supermarket chain? They were around when I was a kid, and are now defunct, but for some reason the company crossed my mind today. And for some really crazy, weird, totally inexplicable reason, I remember their slogan, "Tell a Friend." By the way, what does this memory say about the magnitude of wasted space in my brain?

Apparently, the gimmick behind the Alpha Beta chain was that they alphabetized all the groceries in their stores. So does that mean that grapes were next to granola? I'm not sure. It sounds very complicated, yet also, paradoxically, like a quaint notion from a bygone era.... As does their "Tell a Friend" slogan, which to me, is like saying, "Do our advertising work for us." Although, there is something very compelling about being told to tell a friend. You almost feel obligated to listen.

Speaking of which, the other day, I was in a cafe restroom that had a sign above the toilet seat, imploring, "PLEASE DO NOT PEE ON THE SEAT." Now, gentlemen may not know this, but us ladies pee on the seat too sometimes, especially those of us who hover a few inches above the seat in the name of hygiene. I'm telling you this because I want you to understand that I took this mandate in the restroom to heart. I was seriously concerned that if I accidentally got a bit of wee-wee on the seat, an alarm might go off alerting the proprietor along with all patrons that I had done the big no-no. Fortunately, that did not happen. But who knows what would have transpired, had I taken the non-compliance route?

I guess, to me, this fear of peeing on the seat after being told not to represents a bigger psychological phenomenon--beyond your garden variety "psychology of fear"--which I can't exactly put my finger on... But I'll bet if Stanley Milgram or Ivan Pavlov or one of those dudes was around today, they'd have a better idea about it.

THANKS, MR. GRIFFITH

Hello Everyone,

I had the opportunity to visit the newly-renovated Griffith Park Observatory this weekend. It was a great experience. They've got tons to see--four hours there was barely enough--and a great planetarium show. The telescope on the roof that you can actually walk into (thanks Zeiss) is pretty awesome. They also have a telescope trained on the sun, but since it was evening, we weren't able to avail ourselves of that feature.

Anyway, I just wanted to give props to this guy:






















A Welshman named Griffith J. Griffith, for establishing such an awesome park and planetarium. can you believe how civic-minded that guy was? It's impressive! I wish I could be that cool... Maybe someday...

I'd also like to thank THIS guy:

Galileo Galilei, for contributing so much to astronomy, and for also having the same first and last name--well, almost. I was thinking about how all these dudes like Copernicus and Galileo spent all that time looking at the stars, and figured things out about gravity and dark matter and the universe, and it made me ask myself, "What have I done to better the understanding of the universe lately?" And I quickly came up with an answer. "Not much." But then, those guys didn't have Tivo. Or Ben and Jerry's...

But anyway, I'm determined to work on my scientific contribution to the world. Really, I am. I started by going for a full moon hike at Charmlee wilderness park in Malibu this past week. I just wanted to make sure the full moon was really happening when my calendar said it was. I was simply taking the great piece of advice doled out by so many throughout history, but most recently by Glenn Close in FX's Damages: "Don't Trust Anyone."

Anyhoo, my visit to the observatory brings to mind one of my new favorite quotes: "We're all made of stardust. Why not take a moment to look up at the family album?" This quote comes from a new book called "The Canon: A Whirligig Tour of the Beautiful Basics of Science," by Natalie Angier, a science writer for the New York Times. It's really cool. Check it out.